How to Truly Support Parents After Loss

Supporting parents through miscarriage or infant loss is one of the most meaningful ways to show care, yet it’s often a topic people shy away from. Having experienced this myself, I’ve learned that thoughtful, consistent support can make a profound difference. It’s not about grand gestures but about showing up with empathy and intention.

Acknowledging the loss is a crucial first step. A simple note or heartfelt message can validate their grief without forcing them to talk. Offering specific help—like delivering a home-cooked meal, running errands, or watching their other children—removes the burden of asking. Checking in weeks or months later is equally important, as grief doesn’t follow a timeline. Listening without judgment is key; sometimes, parents just need space to share their story or sit in silence.

I’ve also found that small gestures, like sending a care package with comforting items or remembering significant dates, can provide ongoing support. Avoiding clichés or unsolicited advice is critical—phrases like 'it’ll get better' can feel dismissive. Instead, focus on being present and holding space for their emotions. These acts of kindness, no matter how small, show parents they’re not alone.

• Acknowledge the loss with a kind note
• Offer specific help like meals or errands
• Check in over time, not just initially
• Listen without judgment or advice
• Send thoughtful gestures like care packages

When I went through my loss, a friend’s weekly texts and a small bouquet on the due date meant the world. Supporting parents through loss is about showing up consistently, with love and understanding, to help them navigate their grief.